bras are so expensive like i didn’t choose the boob life the boob life chose me
(Source: u-ltravi0lets, via loveandbe-lovedinreturn)
mermaids don’t have thigh gaps but they can still lure men to their deaths
(via sweetcharade518)
is it just me or is talking to your hairdresser the most uncomfortable thing in the world
(Source: yuckier, via live-to-laugh-and-smile)
| person: | i can spend all day on the internet |
| me: | do you have a tumblr? |
| person: | no |
| me: | i don't understand |
do you ever get into one of those situations where you’re like “I need to stop hating this particular person it’s not going to get me anywhere I’m just going to grow up and move on with my life” but then they do the tiniest thing to piss you off and then you’re like “nope fuck you right off I want to throw you off a bridge”
(via kayleeannn)
this one time i had to look after a fake baby for school and i got like 100% but all i did was shut it up when it cried, he just sat with me on tumblr for 2 days
he was called doug. he also enjoyed fine wine
(Source: khalessiofpizza, via mememaster)
It’s coming up on my favorite time of year where we can play the game “were those gunshots or fireworks?”
(via queens-boro)
how to boys
foie:
- greet
- chat
- chat
- chat
- joke
- joke
- joke
- joke
- compliment appearance
- compliment personality
- flirt
- flirt
- flirt
- hug
- hug
- hug
- hug
- hug
- hug
- amorous hug
- amorous hug
- first kiss
- kiss
- kiss
- kiss
- make out
- make out
- make out
- make out
- woo-hoo
- woo-hoo
- woo-hoo
- propose
(via totoruhroh)
I never had a “boys are icky and gross” phase I’ve literally been chasing dick since birth
(via aidansmith)
I have a vagina and a good sense of humor and my iPod is full of good music like what else DO YOU WANT
(Source: everitas-nudes, via jeromyasakawa)
